Auxiliary Cable

The Music of Today for the People of Tomorrow

These are my opinion leads! Please let me know which you prefer. I personally am attached to the second lead.

Narrative/Anectode - After hours of work, Veena R. was ready to kick back and purchase some music for exercising. She quickly opened the iTunes store and found her favorite Dream Theater album. Excited for some Petrucci while jogging, she then plugged in her phone and attempted to download the new songs. iTunes did not recognize the files as valid and refused to transfer the files.

Compare/Contrast & Twist - In the late 1990s, the CD was the ubiquitous format for music distribution. Music was owned by those who bought it, as they were free to play it on any device they chose and could redistribute the music to their friends, as well as make backups. Twenty years down the road, digital downloads from stores such as iTunes and Napster reign supreme.

And we no longer own the music.

Rhetorical Question - Do you own the music you have purchased? Because of digital rights management, we are limited in where and how often you can play the music you have bought. 

--Quaver

(5) Comments

  1. Vinyl Staff On February 8, 2011 at 11:14 AM

    I like the second one, as well. I think it adds some backstory to your lead and the last sentence, really adds a punch.
    -Claudia

     
    Vinyl Staff On February 8, 2011 at 11:16 AM

    Second one is my favourite, though the second sentence is a little awkward. Try rearranging the ands and commas?

    ~ IBI

     
    Vinyl Staff On February 8, 2011 at 11:16 AM

    I like the second one the most.
    - The EJE

     
    Vinyl Staff On February 8, 2011 at 11:17 AM

    I prefer the second as well, but the last sentence doesn't really seem to flow with the rest of the lead.

    ~OMO

     
    Ezine On February 9, 2011 at 10:44 AM

    I like the second lead, too, but it feels a little stiff. Perhaps you could work a direct address in there to lend a more conversational, direct address to your reader. (For example, "Bought a Michael Jackson CD? You now owned the music and could burn your friends a sweet copy." Or something like that.) The twist effect works well, though, so I think you should keep the overall structure.

    - Mrs. Young

     

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